Thank you SOOOOOOO much for your love and support on my comeback post, bunnies! I am so overwhelmed and humbled by your positive responses. Believe it or not, I have read every single comment, all 381.
Over years of having this blog, I started to slowly become known as a weight loss success story throughout the internet. Most of you even wrote in your comments that you found my blog on Pinterest because of my before and after photo. Being a health food blogger/weight loss success story, your body becomes a huge source of inspiration for others. And when it starts turning back into that before picture, you start feeling like your credibility and career are on the line. This is exactly what was happening in my head those months while I was away from my blog. I sat at home ashamed for letting myself get back to where I had started, for not maintaining my after image that you all know. I put all of my worth into that silly old after photo. I started turning down speaking engagements and blogger summits because I was embarrassed of what I looked like. I thought that if people met me and I wasn’t “skinny” like my after photo anymore, they would… I don’t know, I don’t even know what I really thought. That they would turn me away? Think less of me? I guess deep down I thought people would think I was a fraud. It took me until now and your incredibly kind words and comments to realize that I’m just human, and like SO MANY OF YOU I struggle with my weight.
When I first started my lifestyle change I thought I had this whole healthy eating thing down and that I would never ever go back to the “old me” — my after photo, but my friend Kathy (Healthy Happy Life) recently reminded me that “there’s never an after photo.” I got out my phone and had to write this down in my notes because it hit me like a ton of bricks at that moment. We are never an after photo, we are constantly changing. If anything, my after photo is just a snapshot of that moment, a bit of progress, but ultimately a part of my journey, not a final after photo. I placed so much of my worth on that after photo and feel like I missed out on so many HUGE opportunities because I was embarrassed and ashamed of gaining weight back. Now that… that is the only thing I should be ashamed of. I’m proud of myself for writing that last blog post. It feels like a weight was lifted off of my chest and I can finally breathe. So long story short, thank you for being a part of this crazy journey. Thank you for still coming back to my blog even when I didn’t believe in myself. Thank you for laughing and crying with me. Thank you for your inspiring comments. Thank you to everyone who used Taylor Swift lyrics in your previous comments (huge fan!). And thank you for your honesty and for sharing your stories with me and my other readers. YOU inspire me! I’m so excited for 2016 with my bunnies!
In the new year I want to slightly rebrand, take some new “promo” photos, and add in some more lifestyle posts. But first, I want to start the year off by getting back on track with you guys. I am serious about what I said in my last post about getting back on the wagon and I want to lose weight again and do it with you guys — anyone who wants to join. I am currently in Jackson Hole, Wyoming for New Years with Matt and my friends Brett and Michael, but when I get home, it’s time to shed our fur coats, bunnies! My thoughts are to start with the Skinny Bunny Cleanse (Skinny Bunny Cleanse Revisited). It’s a 5 day whole food cleanse. No juices, starving, calorie counting, or any of that nonsense. You get to eat actual food! It’s hard to start any lifestyle change or diet, but that’s why we are all going to do this together! Support support support! Each day, or at the end of each week I want to post all of my meals and keep a diary of how I felt throughout the day and how my hunger/energy levels were. We’ve got this!
Today I have a cute NYE snack recipe. It’s inspired by one of my fav blog’s Fashion Lush’s Grape & Chia Poppers. I named these little cuties Ch ch ch ch ch ch Cherry Bombs, and now I can’t stop singing “Cherry Bomb” by The Runaways. Oh, and I’ve also included a little DIY for these adorable sparkly pom pom toothpicks.
Ch ch ch ch ch ch Cherry Bombs!
Frozen pitted dark sweet cherries
Greek yogurt (I used Vanilla)
Chia seeds
Toothpicks
1. Place a toothpick in each frozen cherry.
2. Dip each cherry in Greek yogurt.
3. Dip the Greek yogurt covered cherries in chia seeds.
4. Freeze for a few hours or overnight in a freezer safe container and enjoy as a snack.
Sparkly Pom Pom Toothpick DIY
Sparkly pom poms
Toothpicks
Glue gun
Place a dot of glue on the top of a toothpick and place the pom pom at the top. Done!
Kayla Lehman
December 31, 2015 at 4:39 am (9 years ago)You’re the best, Catherine. So proud of you!
Mae
December 31, 2015 at 5:25 am (9 years ago)Hi Catherine!
Just wanted to send you a comment with some positive vibes! Your weight doesn’t dictate the person you are and you are still beautiful, talented, and creative! I have struggled with gaining weight after I lost it and was so angry at myself because I never wanted to be in that place again. I recommitted to my health and went through the journey. I think health and fitness is a lifelong journey and there will always be ebbs and flows depending on the seasons of our lives. It is important to be kind and gentle to yourself and remember why you started this journey in the first place. I believe you can do it and am rooting for you!
Positively Nutritious
January 12, 2016 at 9:25 am (9 years ago)What a beautiful thing to say, and I couldn’t agree more! Love the positive energy. It is so important to encourage and lift each other up. No one wants a world of haters! So happy to see other people who think like me! 🙂
Jennifer
December 31, 2015 at 6:36 am (9 years ago)Thanks so much for the motivation to get back at it in the new year!! We can do it!! Looking forward to reading future blogs to keep me going!! <3
AnneOM
December 31, 2015 at 7:18 am (9 years ago)Joining you in our bunny hop of health and happiness in 2016 and beyond!
Catherine
December 31, 2015 at 8:23 am (9 years ago)I’m so excited to do this with you!! I’m in the same boat, I lost quite a bit of weight and one day I just went completely backwards and gained it all back. BUT! tomorrow is a new day and I have my Skinny Bunny Cleanse shopping list and name twin with me this time! Cant wait to see how we all do this together!
Kathy
December 31, 2015 at 8:25 am (9 years ago)You are adorable. We are our own worst critics. As long as YOU feel healthy and are happy that is all that matters. Have a wonderful New Year!
meganstaggs
December 31, 2015 at 11:07 am (9 years ago)I’m in! I’m excited to do this with you!! Enjoy beautiful Jackson hole!
Carol
January 1, 2016 at 8:51 am (9 years ago)Don’t be so hard on yourself! I struggle constantly just to maintain my weight because of my hypothyroidism. I know I should be eating clean and avoiding certain foods that affect my health and I still fall into the same old traps! All that matters is that you pick yourself up and try again, and I will too!
Jules
January 1, 2016 at 1:15 pm (9 years ago)I just love you. So fricken much. Your dedicate toon to yourself should be an inspiration to everyone, my friend. Now get Matt and your asses to Napa. ❤️
Angela Marie
February 10, 2016 at 11:03 am (9 years ago)Hi Cat,
I’m also following you on this journey. I’ve suffered from weight problems since my pre-teens. I gained 20 lbs. since last year and I hate to admit it, but I’m back to my highest weight. That makes me feel like such a failure! But every day is a new day, so we need to ask ourselves “What can I do today that is going to make me healthier and happier?”
xx
Angela
Rachel S
February 17, 2016 at 7:31 am (9 years ago)I am so glad your back I missed your blog! I would love to join you on your journey!
Nel
March 29, 2016 at 6:47 am (9 years ago)Hello Catherine.
Note: I haven’t really ever gotten into reading/following blogs or commenting in blogs, but last night was an exception.
Ok, so you wanna know how I found your blog???
I sat there last night and googled “Weight loss and weight re-gain story blog”.
It took quite some diligent searching to find your blog and your story about huge weight loss and then re-gaining the weight back because it seems like not much people write about it. I’m sure it happens to a lot of people, but NO ONE WRITES ABOUT IT!!! Seems like they post the BEST and hide the rest.
Why did I google those words? I’m there with you! I didn’t need to read another weight loss inspirational story. I needed to read a story of someone who gained it all back and now is struggling, just like me, to get back on the wagon! (Maybe I should have googled “wagon”).
I have struggled with my weight since I hit puberty. I, naturally, am not a competitive person and not into sports, so it was always a matter of discipline to get active and get into sports, weight training, dancing and hitting the gym. I enjoyed them while I got INTO them, but it’s always a huge PUSH to get INTO something for me.
As far as food, I have learned that food is kind of my drug. Some people do drugs to escape reality or some drink alcohol. When I’m stressed or depressed, when I’m down or exhausted, I turn to food. I’m a huge FOODIE. I come from a culture where everything revolves around eating together and eating a LOT. But also, I have a family history of diabetes & obesity on Dads side.
Right after high-school I was introduced to weight loss pills (Who remembers Metabolife?) and so the 1st 2 years of college my body ran on those pills. They killed my appetite and gave me a ton of energy and I lost the most weight I have ever lost before because I basically starved myself skinny. At my skinniest was when me and my now husband fell in love, and a few years later got married. He didn’t know about the pills and he fell in love with me size 2-6. My hubby is a very fit & active guy with a naturally FAST metabolism, and so if his whole entire family. All of them are really into health and fitness and they can EAT but remain thin and lean. Even after college, during my wedding planning, I already began to put weight back on. My wedding dress was a size 8 and a BARELY fit into it on my wedding day. And of course right after the wedding, weight began SLOOOWLY creeping back on. Then I got pregnant with my 1st baby and I gained 80 lbs during my pregnancy. Then after the baby, I lost half that weight. Then I got preggo with my 2nd child and gained 46 lbs but after my 2nd, I gained even MORE weight during his baby & toddle years.
At my heaviest, I was 256 lbs and a size 20 pants were too tight. (mind you I am only 5’2″!)
When I turned 30 years old, on my birthday, I decided enough was enough. I was SICK AND TIRED OF BEING SICK AND TIRED. So I began watching what I ate and actually started going to the gym! I had my sister-in-law be my accountability buddy and I was at the gym every DAY, sometimes twice a day! (Spin class in the morning and Pilates in the evening.) sloooowly I began losing weight, and YES, everything revolved around what I ate and how much I worked out. I cut out sugar and carbs and basically ran on protein and fruits and veggies. I did many cleanses. And in a year and a half, I lost ALL the weight I gained with my pregnancies. (Down to 170 lbs) My hubby and I were attending a wedding and I was OBSESSED with squeezing into a size 6 dress. I didn’t eat anything for 7 days and drank only black coffee and a tiny bit of water and the scale read 163 lbs.
My husband was in AWE of me at the wedding. (He had NO IDEA what I was putting myself though secretly.) Everyone was SHOCKED to see me. But that week I began to feel very very dizzy.
After that wedding, something happened to my body and I would begin feeling tired, dizzy, especially after working out. My morning workouts usually energized me, but now my legs would feel like jello just walking out of the gym and it seemed like I wanted to sleep all day long. I went to bed tired and I woke up tired and slowly I began skipping the gym. Skipping the gym resulted in quick weight gain, which was depressing and discouraging, with caused me to binge eat late at night, plus being exhausted all the time – I was a hot mess.
I did some lab work and the test showed that I have adrenal fatigue and it’s putting pressure on my thyroid glands so i had some hypothyroidism. I burned out my adrenals by pushing myself like crazy, I ran on black coffee morning and night, and I bottled up all my stress until my body was exhausted. I learned to simplify my schedule and responsibilities, learned to prioritize my sleep and NOT to procrastinate but I also gained ALL MY WEIGHT BACK and today on the scale, I weigh 236. I’m always tired and I have a chronic headache. I completely stopped supersizing and I secretly indulge in sugary foods and carbs, like a drug addict. I eat in my car on in secret and I feel like such a failure and feel so hopeless.
It is one thing to be obese and you lose the weight.
But it’s completely different when you lose wight and gain it all back (plus more). Have you ever seen the movie “Pilot” with Denzel Washington? I feel like him, at the end of the movie, but with FOOD and my weight. I complete relapsed into my drug and it’s killing me.
So Catherine, maybe there is a REASON you re-gained the weight all back. Maybe you are not MEANT to be that Pinterest Before & After person. Maybe you are the person to encourage and inspire those such as me, who re-gained after a “success story” and the world needs to see the vulnerable real example of what happens to SO MANY but NO BODY SEEMS TO BE BLOGGING or PINNING those stories! I want to encourage you to post your “downs” as well as “ups” and keep on keeping on. You are not alone. May your story encourage those who can’t seem to climb back onto that wagon. Those who have no strength and have lost all hope. After reading through your post, I text a personal trainer lady that I met a few years ago but never took advantage of her services. I’m scared. But I’m not alone.
Amy Miller
December 30, 2016 at 11:28 am (8 years ago)So glad that you’re back to posting! Sounds like you have a lot of positives going on in your life! (I read your previous post and this one back-to-back, so I’m commenting on both 🙂 ) I don’t understand how people can be so nasty online, but it’s not unheard of. I’m also struggling with weight gain. I’ve had two kids in 4 years, and I just can’t drop the baby weight. For the past year, I’ve been trying restrictive diets and failing miserably. Now I’m focusing on being healthy and am doing a better job at staying away from junk food. I hope you focus on your health more than the scale 🙂 Lots of love to you!
Stick War
April 4, 2017 at 6:47 pm (8 years ago)I love cherry, thank you for sharing the recipe make this dish, I will try to make it
slope
April 4, 2017 at 8:23 pm (8 years ago)I just love you. So fricken much. Your dedicate toon to yourself should be an inspiration to everyone, my friend. Now get Matt and your asses to Napa. ❤️